S.P.A. Women Ministries,  Inc.

Relax, Relate, Release in God

​Forgive Yourself
By: Adrienne Ortiz

Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the Lord.” And you forgave the guilt of my sin. 
(Psalm 32:5, NIV)

There was a list of people and things that I have struggled with for years to let go of and forgive. I always felt like forgiving them would minimize the offenses. I thought that by forgiving these people, it would allow them to get away with it all and I refused. I must admit that forgiveness can be one of the hardest things you have to do on your journey to growth and peace. Forgiving yourself can be the hardest of all.

Years ago, I was in an abusive relationship with this young man who took out his distresses on me. To make him happy whenever he was unhappy, I gave him control of my life and passed into the fear that he created in return. After being delivered from this situation, I felt comfortable hating this guy and wanting his demise. The hate and anxiety I had for him crippled me. In desperation, I prayed and asked God to heal my heart and mind for a very long time. He did, Hallelujah!! He set me free of the experience and fear. I ran into him years later and felt nothing. Only God could have done that! I was able to greet and wish him well. Then one day, I realized that I had to forgive myself. I was angry with myself for a long time for staying and allowing the abuse. I apologized and asked for forgiveness from my family, friends, and anyone I offended while I was in that unhealthy relationship however, I had not granted myself the forgiveness I had asked God and everyone else for. I had to realize that they had forgiven me and later asked myself, "what are you waiting for?" My older sister reminded me, "there is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus." - Romans 8:1, ESV. She said, "If God is not condemning you, why are you beating yourself up?"

It took a lot of time and struggle for me to give it all up. Still, I finally released all the anger and disappointment I had for myself to my Kinsman-Redeemer and freed myself. Praise the Lord! My Sister, everyone makes mistakes but God's love for us is overwhelming and covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8, NIV). Stop punishing yourself and forgive yourself today. Cast all your anxieties on Him because He cares for you. (1 Peter 5:7, ESV). Sis, I Love You. It's time to love yourself enough to free yourself.

Thought for the Week: Choose to be a true and free worshipper.

Scripture References: 2 Corinthians 5:17-18; Philippians 3:13